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For those who are tired of no responses on dating sites, you can try the meetup. I would just like to express that as far as the traveling aspect that you mentioned, I think for example traveling to France or Eastern European countries is something that should be held for later on as a relationship is extremely serious, possibly marriage, that being said I think it would be a we thing and it would be the responsibility of the relationship to have the financial means to do such things, otherwise I would think traveling locally would be more than sufficient.
There are plenty of places and things to see within the United States. I personally prefer those who are more my height then having to look straight up to the ceiling or crawl up on the latter for a kiss, you cannot change your height nor can you change your age, I personally have come across The opposite where only men seem to want very tall women.
I applaud you for trying these dating sites, I believe it takes a lot of confidence and alot of guts. And saying this I would ask you a question what dating site or sites would you highly recommend versus others? Suppose everyone has a criteria-getting to know someone first, should be first. I have taken a break from the online dating scene. Seems like at times I keep attracting women who I later find out are married. Needless to say I am taking a break and focusing on me. Anyway whenever I feel ready to date again, you the online sites I would prefer are Match.
Too far for me. For Austin, Tx there are too many young college folks here so it can limit choices for mature men like me. As a fellow male you make perfect sense. However, with numbers in their favor, women want it to be just perfect, as they are all entitled. They want an alpha male to tower over them, their mythical hero should be protective of them. I tried internet dating. Could not appeal to attractive ladies. I did meet and date some nice ladies but they were not attractive. They still had their choice of men it seemed. I am now going to save myself the grief and remain alone. Probably not, cannot count on it, but maybe , just maybe, I will meet a lady by chance or someone will introduce me to someone.
I have to say not all women are that way. There are some of us that are good. When I first start seeing someone, I think he should pay but after getting to know him I am willing to pay. It is hard to know when to offer to and when not. Some men are offended by the woman paying. After reading all the comment on this site , I dont think I want to try the dating site.. I have a lot of love in my heart for the right person. I feel it is very important to keep the romantic fire going in a relationship.
If you think we can get along kindly get intouch on jjderickk at g mail.. Hey Derick, what state do you currently live in? And what is your age, and what age women were you or are you looking for? Let me know your status if you want to. If not, I hope you found the women you wanted and are happy. Write me on here and I will reply WKR. It seems that experts are out there rating dating sites. However, their flowing reviews are vastly different than those who actually have experienced the sites and used them.
However, we know that people who do reviews tend to be critical and maybe not bother to review if something works well. As a male, and I am 64, these sites are difficult to have success with. A fellow can initiate numerous messages and for the most part, be ignored. Ladies , again, due to the imbalance, hear from numerous men, and therefore are in total control. The ladies look nice and there are many seemingly on the site, but men will overwhelmingly be ignored.
I tried it and would never consider it again. The profiles may be old or fabricated. I am finishing up a 6 month membership with them. The rates are reasonable. Again, for every 15 ladies you contact with thoughtfully crafted, sincere messages, expect to hear back from ladies. Then , due to the competition, communication with a lady can very easy come to a halt with you wondering why this is so, where did she go? I did meet a couple of ladies from this site but disappointing considering my efforts. I have not tried it yet. However, I previewed the ladies on this site. They appear very nice, but I have seen that before.
I did notice however, that quite a few of the ladies about 60 yrs. Why is this so? Again, it points to the numerical imbalance favoring the ladies. I am financially and emotionally responsible. That said, the odds on dating sites count against me and make success a needle in a haystack.
It is difficult for men and I am sure that females have their own issues such as security. In life, career, etc. I get along with ladies just fine. On dating sites, being ignored, lied to, deceived etc. I tried match and it is a waste of time, talk about unrealistic. I thought we women as we get older must be the problem but those types of men, and there are plenty definitely have and are the problem. So dating sites may work for a few but for the most part I would say no. Phil, you sound really nice and sincere. I disagree with you Phil.
I have just started with these dating sites about a month ago and am already turned off by all the fake profiles. The men that I have corresponded with have not been anything to write home about. The last jerk and yes he was a jerk completely forgot that we had made plans to meet only two days after we talked. When I sent him a text confirming, he responded with I completely forgot all about it. If he changed his mind, he should have been a big boy about it and been honest with me.
Instead his reply made me feel awful. And this is a man in his 50s. I thought guys would have grown up by that age. Well, probably not on these websites. I find the problem with many men.. They take pix with rumpled shirts.. Or their profile pix shows them far away.. I partially agree with you in most areas. I turned 72 in July and after a 46 year marriage, ending in his death, I finally put my self out there.
I dated a few, not so interesting men, and then I met the one. After 6 months I realized he has Alzheimer and his family moved him back home. Several months later I met a real heart breaker. We dated for 10 months and I fell head over heals in love with him only for him to go back to his ex-wife. You just have to week-out the fake, I guess. I think mine has run out and I just need to move on!!! You may be right, Joan…. No companionship, enjoyment of life with another.
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I cannot speak for all males. They do not know about manners or how to properly respect women. Sorry you experience this. However, my being polite and honest may be setting myself up to be deceived, as ironic as that may sound. You seem pretty well educated in this area. Hi Phil I know how you feel. Locations would be nice here. We could stop wasting time with people from demographic areas that are out of reach.
Yes, I know, planes go everywhere, however, I need to be on land first: Where are you Phil? Hi Phil, We women also experience a degree of frustration with online dating as well. Why you ask women want , sex. Where are you located at Phil?? I am Phil, a disillusioned fellow who tried internet dating. I have been honest with ladies but in a few instances have been met with deceit and fabrications. A lady tells me I seem like such a nice fellow but she has met someone she wants to give a chance to.
They have had 3 dates. However, this lady, and it has happened twice to me, remains on 2 dating sites for months. In both instances, I wish them well and say the fellow they have chosen is a lucky gentleman. I strongly believe they are just fabricating this new relationship that they mention to me.. Why would both of these ladies keep their profile up if their story were true? Honestly, I have heard other stories too. In regular life, I really do not encounter people being as deceptive, evasive, or inconsistent. I had the same done to me and I believe that telling you they met someone else is a way for some women to reject you nicely.
So they fabricate the story of meeting someone new. I know that many of these women connect with multiple males at once because it boosts their ego. I had connected with a few who would ask me a question and I would reply only to wait for them to respond for over an hour to answer each time due to them corresponding with other men. It does not make sense. Is there enough men like this floating around on dating sites, that a fellow like me is easily discarded. I know how important aesthetics are on dating sites.
I try to communicate with ladies who would be in my league. However, dating sites give the ladies the advantage. However, i do realize that ladies have issues regarding security, I do get that. I assume you have found a women by now that was suitable for you and not a phony diva type that lied and sent you a fake photo and deceived you or gave you an excuse…I hope all is well.
Otherwise you can contact me so we can chat. Write if you want and tell me about yourself, no fakeness here, just genuine conversation and no games. How old are you and what age were you or are you looking for? If you found someone, let me know, if not you can send me an e-mail…wkrhilly gmail. As a 62 year old woman, I find it near to impossible to meet anyone even remotely within my area who ARE someone I would like to get to know better. I care nothing for one night stands, nor friends with benefits people.
I just am not that type of person. I can do that myself. But a nice companion for dinners and movies would be nice. It seems however that men my age want someone in the bracket. Who does one trust? At this point, after e harmony, Match. I totally understand your comments.. I paiid Our Time 6months met one man and after month talking..
I was so shocked after xoffee I never spoke to him again… So many years younger pics they post… Be honest post current pics. Hey everyone I was on Our time 3 different times and all 3 times met great guys or so I thought the first only lasted a couple of months he wanted to be possessive. I have decided to reenter the dating game after 15 years of keeping silent and to myself with family. I just woke up one day and decided at 66, I want to meet a man that has similar likes and dislikes as me. I have a small farm that I dearly love working on and grow all my food, including chickens.
It is almost impossible to find a man that likes this sort of lifestyle, much less wants to be involved in it. The perfect partner for me would certainly be a small farmer that loves the soil and works it with love every day. He would also have to like salt water fishing because next to the soil that is a big love of mine as well. So it is not going to happen for me unless I take the time and pursue this in places where farmers and fishing are prevalent. Therefore, I will begin to go to those farmer days and outings and I will spend lots more time at the beach fishing.
If I meet someone special that is great. Good luck to everyone looking and be safe always. Hi Linda, thanks for your comment. Linda I totally identify with what you said. In up state NY my options are almost non existent Love to fish be in the oods and grow things. As I read your comment,I felt a little ftustrated.
I have the same comments about these sites as everyone else. I was on Farmers Only for several months and experienced much disappointment. In my profile,I stated who and what I was and that I desired to connect with woman who enjoyef rural life. Truly believe most women on that site were looking for a dtugstore cowboy with a new shiny truck. None of the women on Farmers say they wanted to meet a man with rural roots which I found rather odd.
You just have to keep turning stones. BOB, where is your farm located, and what age women are you looking for or are you looking at all? What is your age? I love rural living and farm life. I am not as into that as I used to be years ago, but still like to cook and especially like to enjoy my food with somebody. It just taste better when there is somebody to enjoy it with.
I know as a senior female I would never be able to find a man who is under 55 or I have been alone for almost 7 years.
Online dating: 10 rules to help find the ideal partner | Life and style | The Guardian
My husband passed away due to lung failure and he was 64 at the time. I think age is only a number. SO, never say never. Send me an e-mail I you want to, would like to know about your rural life…wkrhilly gmail. Strange but unlike most comments here I have found the dating sites overwhelmingly populated by cougars. The 61 yr old female looking for 25 to 50 yr old men. I no longer frequent any of them since most ladies never respond to any show of interest but keep coming back to view my profile but never leaving a message at all.
One thing I am not looking for is more frustration in my life. Marsha Your message is exactly how i feel. Still full time employed and self sufficient, divorced for over 12 years. Not interested in sleeping around. Just want companionship for events, listening to oldies music from the 70s, trips and just exchange experiences and laugh a lot.
But looks like there are NO men going for that.
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Ive decided to just join cultural, gardening and volunteer groups where I can meet people face to face. However, this article is extremely honest and well written. You have to keep safe and keep playing. Lots of people I know are now part of a twosome. Oh Really am new to all this i have also meet a lady that posted her old pictures when she was young. After reading some of the shared comments, I would like to add my two cents worth. It does seem to be challenging to meet quality people for me -men that would like to have q good relationship with a good woman Their mouth or pen is moving.
What is wrong with getting to know a person first? Finding out if you like each other enough to forsake others and try to see if you two can make a go of it? At our age we should have experience enough life to know what basically is negotiable vs is nonnegotiable. How about being comfortable with not only who you are, but where you are in life?
No, I am not talking about sitting all day in a rocker and playing dead. But , enjoying life with whatever disabilities, lumps bumps, etc. Now a days-there seems to be more inference on sex than anything else.
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Sex-when has that ever determine the value of any relationship? Whatever happen to wanting to get to know one another? Which can lead to true friendship and companionship. Do you remember when you could talk to each other about everything and nothing-but still enjoying just being together? How about when you were looking across the room at each other , and sharing that special smile -that special look that said so much?. Yet to others, it said nothing-but to you two ahhh-it was like a secret code that only the two of you knew.
Well, Steve Harvey always says the 90 day rules applies to everyone. Yes Dorene I agree with you as well. I love Steve Harvey and own both of his books on relationships. What he is saying makes a lot of sense. I was in a very bad marriage for 26 years that was hard for me to get out of as my ex was abusive in very many ways. Since I have been out in the dating world I find that everything seems to have changed. But after 26 years I was sure it would be. When I left my ex and found a gentleman who truly was a gentleman and waited to approach me about being intimate. It may have not been the 90 days but it was a while and we dated for four years.
So now I hope that I can find someone who would at least give the relationship time instead of hopping in the sack. I see a psychologist because of my past and let him know of what I am finding in this new world of dating. The bottom line is men and there are women as well are not respectful of one another anymore.
I wish everyone well with their searches and may God bless you. What a well written post, and I totally agree with everything that you said. What happened to men who respected you for the person you are and enjoyed being in your company for the purpose of conversation and connecting mentally? Does anyone believe in companionship or friendship anymore?
Would love to meet a man with honest values and one who is capable of making a commitment. Men Do want younger women and younger men want Sugar Mamas! These dating sites have been a joke. Just stumbled upon this site, loving it. Well I just stumbled onto this site too. I appreciate the thoughtfulness and honesty of the posts here Your post is something i could have said too about women.
I think the sad truth is that most people are not capable of having a truly intimate relationship. It seems the older people are, the more it is true. Most people become more rigid the older they get, and certainly more set in their ways, making them less likely to give up the freedom they have as a single person. I think most of us like the idea of being in a loving relationship. What i have found out is that finding someone who can actually show up when the heat is on and wants to be with me, and i want to be with her is rare, especially being over sixty.
Having a personality and mutual respect is what the foundation should be for any relationship regardless of the age of those involved. It is true that the men are seeking sex….. Just be honest if u want a friend with benefits then let the guy know. If u are not into the guy, pay your own way on the date and move on down the line. No gentleman wants to be considered as an entertainment center at this point in his life and would hope that the woman in his company actually enjoyed his company and was not simply with him for A Night out and a free meal.
Of course, it is my belief that doing the everyday things of life….. Will let us know if we are compatible with one another…. Sitting across from you at some restaurant tells me nothing about you except your table manners. For me at this stage of my life …66…. Best of luck to each of you…. After reading some of the comments about online dating sites I would like to make a comment about Plenty of Fish.
I thought it was a really good website until I got kicked off because all of my emails from them kept going in my spam. Try to get back on there and it is next to impossible. I have written to them several times to see if they could help me get back on. The scammers are everywhere on all of these sites. I was almost scammed 3 times I am ashamed to admit but they are very devious! I am 61 years old and find that most of the men I talk to have nothing but sex on their mind.
I think our world is going to hell really quick. It is very depressing and I wish there were more honest people on these sites and not jerks! Needless to say I am still looking for a good man. In March when I officially retire I think I am going to start looking at activities through churches and community buildings to try to meet people. It seems to me that would be the only way to meet someone as I am not a bar hopper or nor do I go to clubs.
Good luck everyone on finding your soul mate! Kevin Gillham it is good to hear there are good men out there. I am sorry that your marriage ended the way it did. I have stopped going on the online dating sites. I was diagnosed with another health issue that I have confronted and in the process have lost forty pounds and am doing really well. I know my problems were due to an abusive marriage and now I am feeling more confident about myself. I enjoyed your feedback and hope to hear from you again.
Hi Kevin Same thing happened to me. Hi Kevin, yOu sOund like the man every woman dream of. I bet yOur not alone anymore. I thought you needed to be at least 60, so you got a couple of years to go…Are you still looking for someone to share some time with and get to know or did you meet that special lady already.
This comment was written in but this is March of You must be happily married by now, or at least engaged…If not, send me a few lines. I am looking for from around 60 to 75, and am very new to doing this. My angel does an excellent job of watching over me. Where do you live now and are you still actively looking for someone? I am now free and have been for almost 7 years. Husband passed away in from lung failure.
This is the First time I visited this site…. And out of curiousity i read many of the comments and the replies… there seems to be quite a bit of confusion about sex and indivuales …. I agree with you on almost E very thing that you said. If you live near or close to , we can bond and explore.. Thanks and God bless! I wish you the best of luck! New also and none of this real sounds like it is even worth the effort.
Thank you very much. I think it more says, well I want to know what I will get for my dollar coffee and of course my one hour of invested time. I hear the women and the men and my view for what its worth sounds like both are a little defensive, with good cause. You may find a treasure or merely a friend. You will have gotten to know another person. Enough said, no lecture intended. Most men are jerks. Most men get older but not necessarily more mature. Most men never learn how to be friends first with women. Most men are too concerned with sex as if sex is the answer to everything.
I was looking for compatibility and connection, for communication, for shared interests and values. If you had read my profile on OK Cupid, if you had answered a few hundred questions, like I did, it would be easy for you to determine that I was a quality guy. What matters is that you carefully weed out the wheat from the chaff. You just have to sort out the frogs from the princes. Not all women on these sites are prizes either. There is usually a good reason or two why women are single later in life. I think what our society does in general to men is not conducive to making them good in relationships.
Men are told not to cry, not to show emotion, not to be vulnerable. I was just lucky to be born into a culture that rejects that view of men and teaches respect, if not adulation, for women. The larger issue is how men get to be the way they are. You know the old saying, about the hand that rocks the cradle can change the world? There are good men out there, like me.
Sure a lot of us are taken, just like a lot of good women are taken. The time you spend complaining can be better used in searching. Thanks for your comment. I wish you well! If you can get a clone made of you laughing then tell him to send me an e-mail so we can see if we have anything in common. I like what you wrote. I found myself single after my husband passed away in May of from lung failure. He was only 64 at the time. Met one man that is 86 ok but he is married to a 91 yr.
About that clone, have him e-mail me if you would. I am a senior and live in West Virginia at the moment. It sounds to me that these are sex preditors lurking on the site and their profiles are probably phoney. Absolutely do not respond to them; rather, please report them to the site. These guys could be very dangerous.
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There are good and honest people everywhere, some may not be in your location so if you such you have to sacrifice to get them. At 53, I know my best sex years are behind me physically but I still have the desire to have my hands on her curves, lips kissing her in the spots that at least I am attracted to, nape of her neck, as a for instance , etc.
Do you really think you are going to find a best friend who is the opposite sex? Best friends become so … because they have same interests, and through the pursuit of their interests they are for lack a better term, thrust together and their time spent enjoying that interest buys time spent with another which then can blossom into a true friendship.
Not a lot of women are dedicated to football, hunting, etc, the things that men are often found around. If I am seeking a best friend, then I will look in the areas where I am going to have a good time too. Anyways the problem I have become convinced is the true enemy, is how many women cannot get happy with their appearance, not even to the point of when I am very adamant about how much I love their breasts I happen to prefer breasts that are saggy, because to me, those are real breasts, perky just makes me feel like a pedophile , and I use that as an example, it could just as easily be their bottom or legs or whatever.
Point is that if I say it turns me on … take my word for it! And let go like you would if you DID have that body that you seem to think is SO important to have a great sex life. I know its not an answer, just an explanation. We do at least try. I could name the ones which make us men look less flattering but you Ladies know which ones hurt your situation more. So ya, whether the man admits it or not, and whether he is able to even perform or not, its still about sex.
She knows and keeps his secrets, and he loves her for that because again … sadly in our world today, it is THAT important to a man that he be viewed as a MAN, in full and completeness. Lastly , it is true most or many men are POS. Would like to know more so can write me at nelykeoyahoo. Hey Steve, I just found this site tonite and have been writing people to get to know some of them maybe. What I am replying to is the very long one that you wrote. The longest one on here. This is a Senior Planet website and I am thinking that people on here would be maybe between 55 and 80 or more.
I liked it that you can write ALL of what you wrote. Not just the subject matter, but the fact that we are both writers. I love e-mailing and the longer they are the better for me. I was e-mailing with a man who was famous at his one-liners. I have 2 published books out as of and nothing was more frustrating than his one lines…. Anyway, I am sure you have found someone by now. I noticed that a Nelly wrote you, did you hook up with her? Of anyone else for that matter, if so congratulations, if not send me an e-mail as long as your heart desires , tell me where you live and your real age and we will take it from there.
Getting to know the person, likes, dislikes etc. Having my questions answered are important to me and a man that can carry on a decent conversation and that is safe. I will do a background investigation most likely just to be sure or as sure as I can be. It pays to be very cautious. My e-mail is wkrhilly gmail. Whereas I support most of that, the complexities of such an agenda are too great. All that counts in this society is money. We have a crass commercial culture that is totally about what you look like, how much money you make, the car you drive, the house you live in, etc.
Heads up for men who are broke: All the while he was a white collar criminal. He finally got caught and went to prison. The state took everything [of hers and his] and considered all assets to be fruit from the poisonous tree. AARP has 30,50,70 age range yet its advertised as over70dating. I sure wish I could find a way to no longer receive email messages about this thread. I have sent 2 messages to your site, and I never get a reply, and I still get an email every time someone comments.
There is no unsubscribe anywhere. Thanks for removing me from the email list. I am with a verrrrry special man who I met through okcupid. There are some good and honest ones out there! If you ladies think you have it bad. I am 71 and a widow. I too, look a lot younger. I have been on our time for only a short time and had several contacts. Three of them I have met. Only one was close to my age. The other two were 80 and But, like of you said, they want women 10to15 years younger. Would you mind telling me which side you have checked out.
Almost dread starting all over again with the new site. I have been on several of the senior dating sites for several months. I finally figured out that men are not interested in women over 60 no matter how good the women might look. Then they are looking for anyone as a nurse or a purse. Very sad how women our age are so disrespected—even by AARP.
Look at the women they feature on their covers. You are wrong GG. You might be right in general terms, but I want to grow old with someone who will be facing the same things at the same time as I will. I choose a woman too much older than me, and odds are I will first have to watch her suffer through some horrible illness and then have to bury my love. At least not to the ability I could have, when I was their age.
I have tried all the date sites and never had any luck. They all tell you what you want to hear and all become lies. Or all want money. No luck with any or them. Free or not, every senior dating site sucks! They claim and advertise things that are not true! How can we, as seniors, who are disgusted and tired of their lies, bring them down?
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